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    s an inevitable consequence of the aging process, all humans lose the ability to seamlessly adjust the focus of vision from distance to near, introducing the “heartbreak of presbyopia.” This phenomenon makes even the most trivial visual task at near next to impossible. But when we’re picking a life partner, everybody’s different. So in an ideal world, we would have the ability to search every single person out there and pick the ideal match.


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    So my dating advice is this: when you are getting ready for a date, look in the mirror and find all the things that are right with your body.Notice how your eyes twinkle, how your arms have good definition, your beautifully-shaped hands.The road to finding a rich and fulfilling love relationship often seems littered with broken promises, dreams that lost their luster years ago, out-of-date wives tails, and too many failed diets.As a relationship coach, I have heard scores of broken-hearted stories.Yes, the mirror often shows us all the things we do not like about our bodies.It generates lots of negative self-talk and doubts about your attractiveness, especially when you are about to meet a new hottie for your first date.But I just found some new studies that have shown something remarkable, something that flies in the face of all that!Researchers found that a mirror can actually work its magic in a positive direction if you know how to use it.

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    (In more detail here) It’s all based on public interaction.In these studies obese adults and adolescents were told to look in a mirror and discuss their bodies in a positive way.After six mirror sessions the subjects shifted their focus from what they thought was wrong to what was right with their bodies. As a result, these obese people had an increase in their body satisfaction and experienced less disgust and anxiety about their appearance. Remember also that many clinical studies have shown that shifting to more positive self-talk reduces anxiety and stress especially in social situations.We all know what it is like getting ready for a date or a big event, peering into the mirror and not liking what we see.The extra pound, a bulge here, a wrinkle there, a zit you can't get rid of, not to mention hair that absolutely will not cooperate with your brush.

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